Fred Thompson on a recent campaign stop in his living room.

Fred Thompson To Campaign From Home

LAWRENCEBURG, Tenn. (CAP) - Telling reporters that the campaign trail is wearing him down and that he needs to "focus on what matters," Republican presidential candidate Fred Thompson has announced that he will do the rest of his campaigning from his home in Tennessee.

President Bush pardons the official Thanksgiving squashes, Lumpy and Frumpy.

President Bush Pardons Thanksgiving Squash

WASHINGTON (CAP) - Following his pardon of the official national Thanksgiving turkey, President Bush has announced that he is also pardoning squash, turnips and cranberry mold. The President made the announcement during a televised address from the White House.

OJ Misinterprets Double-Jeopardy, Pleads Guilty

LAS VEGAS (CAP) - In a stunning development today, OJ Simpson entered a guilty plea to answer the kidnapping and robbery charges he's facing in Nevada, claiming that the legal rule of "double jeopardy" would protect him from having to do any jail time.

FBI agents make final preparations before the nighttime raid on Santa's village.

Santa's Elves Caught In Recalled Toy Sting

NORTH POLE (CAP) - Capping an elaborate sting operation, FBI officials yesterday announced that they will be charging 12 of Santa's elves with operating a recalled-toy scam that netted at least $20 million and could have put the lives of millions of children in danger this Christmas season.

Documents Reveal Thompson Twins Not Even Related

BOSTON (CAP) - Recently unearthed documents obtained by the CAP News Investigative Team expose startling information about '80s pop sensation The Thompson Twins. According to the slightly smudged mimeographs, not only were the duo not twins, they were not blood relatives at all.