Ye Gods! If you had to stare at that in the
mirror every morning, wouldn't you go to a hairstylist even if she
said some bad words?
Hillary Defends Hair Stylist's Anti-Men Remarks
PHILADELPHIA (CAP) - Hillary Clinton's uphill climb to the
Democratic presidential nomination took a turn for the steeper
yesterday after it was revealed that her long-time hair stylist
made disparaging remarks against men. Clinton defended her
continued visits to the hairdresser even after she learned of the
sexist comments.
WASHINGTON (CAP) - A Justice Department investigation has
revealed that a May, 2001 email which President Bush failed to
forward to seven friends as instructed has indeed resulted in the
seven years of bad luck the country has endured at his hands since
then. Bush acknowledged the mis-step during a press conference.
Fred Thompson on a recent campaign stop in
his living room.
Fred Thompson To Campaign From Home
LAWRENCEBURG, Tenn. (CAP) - Telling reporters that the campaign
trail is wearing him down and that he needs to "focus on what
matters," Republican presidential candidate Fred Thompson has
announced that he will do the rest of his campaigning from his home
in Tennessee.
President Bush pardons the official
Thanksgiving squashes, Lumpy and Frumpy.
President Bush Pardons Thanksgiving Squash
WASHINGTON (CAP) - Following his pardon of the official national
Thanksgiving turkey, President Bush has announced that he is also
pardoning squash, turnips and cranberry mold. The President made
the announcement during a televised address from the White
House.
LAS VEGAS (CAP) - In a stunning development today, OJ Simpson
entered a guilty plea to answer the kidnapping and robbery charges
he's facing in Nevada, claiming that the legal rule of "double
jeopardy" would protect him from having to do any jail time.
FBI agents make final preparations before the
nighttime raid on Santa's village.
Santa's Elves Caught In Recalled Toy Sting
NORTH POLE (CAP) - Capping an elaborate sting operation, FBI
officials yesterday announced that they will be charging 12 of
Santa's elves with operating a recalled-toy scam that netted at
least $20 million and could have put the lives of millions of
children in danger this Christmas season.
BOSTON (CAP) - Recently unearthed documents obtained by the CAP
News Investigative Team expose startling information about '80s pop
sensation The Thompson Twins. According to the slightly smudged
mimeographs, not only were the duo not twins, they were not blood
relatives at all.