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Remember being bored out of your skull because your parents dragged you to some stupid museum when you were a kid? Well, it could have been worse. Much worse. Because there are apparently museums out there capable of inflicting the kind of trauma a person never recovers from. #7.
El Museo De Las
Momias
Location: Guanajuato, Mexico The El Museo is the museum of HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THAT!
Why... does that exist anywhere? To say this is a museum full of mummies doesn't even come close to conveying the unspeakable horror of this place. How about this: In ancient Rome, and college fraternities, there is a brutal and humiliating tradition known as running the gauntlet, during which you strip naked and run through a valley of horrors. Guanajuato's El Museo De Las Momias ("Museum of the Mummies") is just like that, except that it's the spectators who are naked. And dead.
The Mummies of Guanajuato are naturally preserved bodies from a cholera outbreak that hit Guanajuato way back in 1833. Since this is basically just a huge open grave with floodlights, its legality and moral status continues to be the subject of much discussion everywhere except in Mexico.
Most of the mummies on display were corpses whose families could not afford to pay a grave tax levied on their families once they died. If you failed to pay the taxes, you guessed it...
Hey, have we mentioned the babies?
Oh, and while we're on the subject of nightmarish carnivals of the rotting dead... #6.
Catacombe dei
Cappuccini
Location: Palermo, Sicily Welcome to Catacombe dei Cappuccini: the Capuchin Catacombs of Palermo, Sicily. Described as a "human library," the Catacombs serve as an invaluable historic record on everything from clothing trends to fear tolerance.
In 1599, the monks who lived here discovered a great new method for embalming the dead, and as the situation warranted, they went to work embalming each other. Then wealthy locals wanted to be interred in the Capuchin Catacombs as a status thing. Despite being as old as Galileo and bombed to hell during World War II, some of the inhabitants of the Capuchin Catacombs still look pretty fresh...
...And all of them dressed in the finest clothes, eagerly awaiting the Resurrection.
Seriously, what the fuck...
#5.
The Glore
Psychiatric Museum
Location: St. Joseph, Missouri The Glore Psychiatric Museum, formally known as Missouri's State Lunatic Asylum No. 2, is like the Event Horizon of art galleries.
The museum takes its name from one George Glore, who in the 60s, put his patients/inmates at the St. Joseph State Hospital to work building full-size replicas of some of the most horrific psychiatric practices from the last few centuries--which makes about as much sense as making the inmates at Guantanamo Bay build Big Macs until they love America.
The result is a weird and terrifying excursion through the minds of a hundred lunatics, displaying patient art which ranges from sophisticated...
To South Park...
But the, uh, highlight of the museum has to be this magnificent mosaic, which was constructed entirely from the stomach contents of a woman suffering from compulsive swallowing.
It is actually hard to picture anyone going crazy over anything in Missouri, but now that we have seen what their hospitals look like, it is probably best to avoid the state. After all, the woman who swallowed those 1,446 objects died in surgery. So who the fuck made the mosaic? #4.
The Museum of
Menstruation & Women's Health
Location: New Carrollton, Maryland We're all adults here, hopefully. Menstruation isn't any more disgusting than the other bodily functions we don't discuss in polite company. So what's wrong with having a museum dedicated to the subject?
How about the fact that it's in some random dude's basement in lower Maryland.
While there genuinely is a long history to menstruation's imprint on culture, from its symbolic record to its inclusion in Cervantes' Don Quixote , the Museum of Menstruation & Women's Health is really just the story of one man with a dream: Harry Finley. Since 1995, this humble, middle-aged American has devoted his life to making his private collection of feminine hygiene products and mutilated mannequins available to the public. His work has received accolades from Johns Hopkins University and The New York Times--at least according to his website--and Harry's reputation has since blossomed from local neighborhood character to a character from a Thomas Harris novel. Among the museum's collections are a dress made out of tampons...
...well kept archives...
...whatever the hell these are...
...and finally, the intimacy of knowing that you and Harry are the only people in the house. For real. Since 1999, all visits to the museum/Harry's basement have had to be done by appointment and in private.
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Harry Finley; Rapist.
Im going to stand up, walk out of this room and we shall never speak of these evil places again.
good lord, St.Joseph is just down the road from me...suddenly I'm worried about where I live
oh nice !Sadly, My boyfriend and me broke up weeks ago. yeah..
i’m young ,beautiful,lonely and still hurting.i may be
in need of someone to love..still..My friends told me about
A g e l e s s k i s s .C’ 0- M. and i got curious about it..
they met their boyfriends there.,It’s the best place to meet
a older boyfriend or a younger girlfriend. i cant risk myself.
.So i got a username sara lady there in order to find a new
boyfriend.is it wrong?
W
"BUY POSTCARDS"... omg, I just laughed so hard like it was delivered by the worst Scooby Doo villain hahaha.
Elmo's dick? Seriously? I thought it would have just been a red fuzzy tube, kind of a joke more than anything. f**king scary.
What about the amazing museum in Rome with all the mummified bodies/bones? Can't remember the name, but come on they have a perfectly mummified little girl that looks completely alive!!!
I had to go to the Mutter museum as part of a high school band trip. It was so horrifying every one in the band had left after 5 minutes.
I would so rather go to all of the other museums in this list in one day than go to the ventriloquist museum. Those dummies are the most terrifying thing in the world.
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Was just at the Mutter Museum a couple weeks ago. By far one of the coolest (albeit grossly disturbing) museums I've ever been too.
The man who owns the Menstrual Museum is obviously a serial killer. A perfect one too. As soon as he kills you, your blood is absorbed by the numerous tampons...
I wonder what happened to the intern who had to do research for this article?
What the hell? Dude, I was eating!
This article is really hard to masturbate to.
if you squint it gets easier
"BUY POSTCARDS!" HAHahaha, dunno why but that was one of the best things on Cracked in a while
I know I couldn't stop laughing at that caption/photo combination
I agree 100% That s**t had me laughing for 10 minutes :D
Holy s**t, this article was equal parts hilarious and creepy. "BUY POSTCARDS" made me laugh out loud so hard. And I'd rather see 10,000 inside out babies then be in that horrific dummy museum.
somehow i knew the mutter museum would b on this list. it's funny while all the other places on the list sound freaky as s**t, the mutter museum didn't freak me out when i went there; i thought it was fascinating.
By far the creepiest one is the Menstrual Museum. I mean, I am sure the gross out factor is higher in Mutter or the c**k n Tackle shop.
But it's some guy, in his basement, and you have to agree to come see it alone.. WITH him....
I smell "serial killer" all over this like an old tampon, he just hasn't been caught yet.
stay out of the ventriloquist museum, pistol pete is their leader! none of us are safe!
Don't you mean "Popsicle" Pete?
Hehe, the ventriloquist;s name was Willy Wood. And as for the Icelandic c**k museum, a large penis is always welcome.