Weddings are toasting festivals. For
spotlight-lovers, the bevy of hot microphones is a dream come true;
for others, it's a vigorous exercise in the fight-or-flight reflex.
Whatever your place in the toasting lineup, the following
suggestions can help you handle the attention and honor like an old
pro.
The Basics. These tips apply to almost any
toast we can think of.
Plan it out. Don't expect brilliance to visit
you spontaneously. Rope it ahead of time and bring it along.
Practice beforehand. No need for a rigorous
rehearsal schedule. Just run through it a few times and time
yourself--five minutes at the most.
Make a few notes. A microphone and a room of
expectant faces can freeze up even practiced public speakers. Notes
are your insurance.
Introduce yourself. Unless you're the bride or
groom, someone in the room might not know who you are.
Avoid risqué, off-color, or overly embarrassing jokes
or stories. This includes randy escapades and tales of old
lovers.
Explain (or avoid) insider references. Always
provide enough context or backstory to make the punch line
universally understandable.
The Ideas. Casting about for the content of the
toast? Put one or more of these tried-and-true ideas to work for
you.
Tell 'em a story. Pick a brief story about one
or both members of the couple and tie its significance to the power
of the moment at hand.
Make a gesture. Offer a physical token or
expression as an emblem of the marriage, the past, or the
future.
Borrow a line. Turn to poets, philosophers,
comedians, and social historians for inspiration.
Wish from the heart. Begin, "May you always…"
and end in a blessing that uncorks the driest tear ducts in the
room.
However you structure your toast, be sure to include a thank-you
to the hosts and to the guests for traveling to make the
event.
The Delivery. Need a few final tips to command
the room while at the mike? Here's your crib sheet for a smooth
delivery.
Wait until the crowd is listening
Speak clearly and audibly
Speak more slowly than you think you need to
Pause for breath if you lose your place or are overcome
Make good eye contact with the couple and the rest of the
group
Go easy on the alcohol before the toast
Our final words of advice? Be yourself and keep it short and
sweet--it's always better to leave them wanting more.
