Clips tagged humor

SURE, FARTS ARE FUNNY – But Do We Want To Eat Them?

frankbuddenbrock — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 04:22:34 -0000

No selection was clipped for this page

Chiles y Risas: bromas

jen1979 — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 23:41:01 -0000

Clipped by jen1979

10 Celebridades que se parecen a personajes animados

Hola a todos!

El día de hoy quiero compartir con ustedes 10 imagenes de algunas celebridades que se parecen graciosamente a algunos dibujos animados. Admito que en algunas de ellas el parecido es simplemente por la posición de la fotografía o por el look de la luminaria en ese momento pero aun así no dejan de ser graciosas.

Mr Slave y Freddy Mercury

Peter Pan y Justin Bieber

Ursula y Queen Latifa

Rafiki del Rey León y Morgan Freeman

Rihanna y el Pájaro Loco

Carrot Top (no lo conozco en realidad pero me impresionó su parecido) y Lion O

El príncipe de La Sirenita y Patrick Dempsey

La perra de la Dama y el Vagabundo y Goldie Hawn

Bill Murray con barba y Papá Pitufo.

Anderson Verajao y Bob Patiño

Suscribirse a: Entradas (Atom)

Chiles y Risas: bromas

jen1979 — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 23:39:00 -0000

Clipped by jen1979

No selection was clipped for this page

Drunk Hotline

sufiankhan — Wed, 09 Mar 2011 05:50:33 -0000

Clipped by sufiankhan

No selection was clipped for this page

5 Things Girls Do To Look Better In Facebook Pictures | Rounds.com Blog

jen1979 — Sun, 07 Nov 2010 23:36:41 -0000

Clipped by jen1979

5 Things Girls Do To Look Better In Facebook Pictures

November 4th, 2010

Category: Everything Else

2 Comments

144 diggs digg

72 like

Remember the days of AOL chat rooms, when you could pretend to be anyone at all and no one would ever know? Nowadays it’s hard to hide your real identity, what with Facebook and all. So what’s an ugly girl to do to ensure that people won’t run screaming from her profile?

Here’s a list of the 5 best tips, tricks and cheats that ugly girls use to make themselves look somewhat normal in their facebook pictures:

1. Only Show Your Face

Ever heard the term Butterface? Everything looks good…but her face. Well, occasionally, the opposite can occur and when it does it’s not pretty. Actually, the face is pretty…

which is why they hide their flabby fannies:

2. Showcase Your Special Talent

…so that no one has to see your hideously deformed face. Um, is she twirling that baton with her crotch? See, I am no longer even remotely curious about what her face looks like. I do wonder how she trained her ass to eat that leotard, though.

3. Dim The Lights

Sure, when you can’t see the horrible acne scars, moldy teeth, and greasy unwashed hair they looks great.

…but it’s a whole different story in day light.

4. Work That “Myspace Angle”

See, all the photography-savvy girls know that a good angle will hide practically any flaw. Which is why when you see a hottie in a picture like this…

She actually looks like this….

Sorry to burst that bubble.

5. Get Creative

Occasionally, you get a girl so atrocious that none of these other tricks work. That’s where the real creativity comes in…

Have you been fooled by one of these tricks? Share your story!

Category: Everything Else

Tags: Facebook, facebook funny profiles, facebook profile pics, facebook tips and tricks, funny

2 Comments

stupid

November 7, 2010 at 2:49 pm

what a rip off — http://www.brobible.com/story/.....n-facebook
jojack

November 7, 2010 at 2:37 pm

Where was this blatantly ripped from without giving credit?

« Really Google?

Creative Stop Signs »

brad2512 RT @rioferdy5: I am going to the @mrdavidhaye fight next week and I don't wanna be short changed!I want 5-6rounds of pure toe 2 toe then BoooM! And still.. 3 days ago reply

Hammo86 RT @rioferdy5: I am going to the @mrdavidhaye fight next week and I don't wanna be short changed!I want 5-6rounds of pure toe 2 toe then BoooM! And still.. 3 days ago reply

pinikaufman RT @rioferdy5: I am going to the @mrdavidhaye fight next week and I don't wanna be short changed!I want 5-6rounds of pure toe 2 toe then BoooM! And still.. 3 days ago reply

Join the conversation

Rate and Comment On Funny Pictures

kleszcz — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 19:32:32 -0000

Clipped by kleszcz

No selection was clipped for this page

11 best commercials featuring Darth Vader | Blastr

jen1979 — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 18:55:54 -0000

Clipped by jen1979

The Syfy Online Network

TAKEOVER CONTENT HERE

darth vader • Star wars • weird stuff

By Jon Cohen

3:00PM on Aug 20, 2010

11 best commercials featuring Darth Vader

digg

451 Share

Although you may not agree with every decision George Lucas has made over the years, nobody can deny the guy has a pretty good idea how to run a successful marketing campaign. Hey, if selling toys hadn't been been part of the picture, we might have even seen a different ending to Return of the Jedi!

Lots of companies have tried to cash in on Lucas' money machine since the first Star Wars came out in 1977 by paying homage to the film and its characters in commercials, including a certain evil Sith lord who you wouldn't think would make the best pitchman. But it turns out he is!

Check out 11 of our favorite commercials featuring Darth Vader, and let us know which ones you think are the most memorable.

Spike

Darth uses the force to help improve his poor golf skills. Makes sense to us!

Energizer

If Vader only had a set of Energizer batteries, the whole Star Wars saga might have ended differently.

Orange

Turns out those Jedi mind tricks don't always work.

Target

Even Lord Vader is excited by the presence of Heidi Klum.

WWF

Darth takes a stand against global warming. (We guess he only want to conquer temperate planets.)

DirecTV (Spanish)

Vader and friends (if you can call them that) celebrate Christmas.

Pepsi

Darth doesn't like theater audiences making noise during the movie any more than the rest of us.

NES

This vintage ad for Nintendo's first Star Wars game shows the only way any of us will ever be able to defeat Lord Vader.

M&Ms

Starring Red, Yellow ... and Darth Vader

TomTom

I don't know about you, but I'd never tell Darth Vader to try breathing more quietly.

Hagoromo tuna

Strange ... somehow we always felt Darth would choose red meat over fish.

Comments (23)

Comment by logging in via

Facebook

Twitter

Chris on Aug 20, 2010 03:52 PM

Minor typo in the article. It states that Star Wars came out in 1975, when in fact it came out in 1977. Reply

pictishmac on Aug 23, 2010 12:15 PM

Um, the article states 1977

GTPodcast on Aug 20, 2010 03:57 PM

I swear I remember a Bud Light commercial from the mid 80s that ran on Saturday Night Live at least once. A guy goes up to a bar and says "Gimme a light" (their catchphrase in a series of commercials at the time), the bartender (offscreen) ignites a lightsaber and cuts off the guy's tie, then the guy says "I meant a BUD Light"...

I only ever saw this commercial once. Maybe they hadn't gotten the right licensing and had to pull it. Does anyone else remember this commercial? Reply

Spot on Aug 20, 2010 04:17 PM

Every time I finish watching a Japanese TV Commercial I thank God that I was born in the United States. Reply

Greg on Aug 20, 2010 05:13 PM

Unfortunately we usually only see the really bizarre or shocking (to american audiences) commercials from Japan here in the USA. Most of the commercials are very similar to the commercials here... and some are Incredibly awesome and beautiful. Just like here in the USA... most commercials are dreck... and some are incredibly cool. Also, considering that after the commercial above you see a flash of the Space Battleship Yamato... I imagine this commercial came out in 1977 - 1980 some time.

sickofit on Aug 20, 2010 06:15 PM

Everytime i read comments off people like you in makes me glad im not american!!!!

Loki on Aug 20, 2010 06:34 PM

Oh come off it @sicofit. @Spot is only being facetious. You have to admit that the Japanese television spots, although I am sure these sorts of things are not truly representative, to tend to the real extreme end of things. He is just commenting on how weird the stuff sometimes is. No need to get all anti-American in general, no matter how trendy that is on boards these days.

Headcase on Aug 20, 2010 05:06 PM

I freaking LOVE that Direct TV one. Reply

AF519 on Aug 20, 2010 08:48 PM

Me too! I also like the M & M's commercial!

Xander on Aug 20, 2010 06:03 PM

Put up a few commercials from the SPACE channel in Canada. They have awesome Darth Vader scenes. Like when for a summer tv promo they had Darth Vader cut in line to buy ice cream but didn't have the money to pay so he force chokes the ice cream man and walks away. EPIC. Reply

The Moleman on Aug 20, 2010 06:27 PM

The Tom Tom one is the best. Vader doing the Dum-Dums is great and Roundabound. Reply

Omen on Aug 20, 2010 07:35 PM

Ever wonder why no Leia as slave girl commercials? Reply

coolhand on Aug 21, 2010 11:01 AM

Saab had a cool one that morphed the car's grille into Vader's helmet, with the tagline "The Official Car of the Sith." Reply

David on Aug 21, 2010 11:25 AM

The first one (the golf one was good) but it was all downhill from there. Reply

Obiwan on Aug 21, 2010 11:57 AM

Check out in youtube yoo cablevision for the best darth vader commercials they are new! Reply

oberon on Aug 21, 2010 12:00 PM

They should add the burger king one! Reply

William on Aug 21, 2010 08:55 PM

Like the Orange one best, followed by the WWF one (cause it's in my native language, Dutch) Reply

Si on Aug 22, 2010 01:04 PM

That Japanese ad OMG I thought i had nodded off and had some really bizarre nightmare! Reply

Lee on Aug 22, 2010 11:04 PM

Did anyone notice at right at the end of the Japanese ad you get a very brief glimpse (pause video to confirm) of the Space Cruiser Yamoto? Makes you wonder when the ad ran and who the target audience was. Reply

Scudd on Aug 23, 2010 08:04 AM

You missed the best one http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqNVTH1AP4I Reply

Jo Dean on Aug 23, 2010 08:05 AM

OK that alloks like a lot of fun!

Lou

www.privacy-tools.eu.tc Reply

dave on Aug 23, 2010 09:31 AM

The TomTom GPS commercial is the best. He really sounds like an aging, slightly senile, Darth. Reply

ScorpyX on Aug 23, 2010 11:56 AM

That Spike one is hilarious. Reply

Comment by logging in via

Facebook

Twitter

name

Please Enter the Name

Please enter a valid email address

Invalid Email address

comment (Maximum 5000 characters allowed)

Please Enter the Comment Text

Oops. Please remove all profanity before submitting your comment.

Comment text more than 5000 characters long. Please edit it to have your post go live

Security

Incorrect please try again

Refresh

Enter both words below:

Enter the numbers you hear:

Please Enter the captcha

Comment

Please Enter the Comment Text

Oops. Please remove all profanity before submitting your comment.

9 Jobs Most Men Would Die For | Cool Material

jen1979 — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 17:19:36 -0000

Clipped by jen1979

9 Jobs Most Men Would Die For

By Ben Dahl

After exploring the world of gorgeous supermodels naked in the Amazon (not the website) with our tour guide Terry Richardson, we came to the conclusion that he has a job that most men would die, or kill, for. Everyone has a vice; it could be women, cars, spirits, ice cream or music, it just depends on the individual. We set out to find the guys who are doing the things we enjoy doing on a regular basis – but they’re getting paid for it. The only thing you need to figure out by yourself is where to sign up.

186 diggs digg

Terry Richardson – Photographer

You can read all about Terry’s accomplishments and accolades while checking out the Pirelloi 2010 Calendar, but you would gladly sacrifice yourself to be him. As a final parting thought about his job, when was the last time you got to suck on the digits of the Gossip Girls? Just sayin’.

Jonathan Cutler – Brewmaster

Jonathan Cutler (middle) is the Brewmaster for Piece Brewery and Pizzeria in Chicago. Saying that Jonathan is good at his job is like saying Usain Bolt is good at running. Cutler (for his work at Piece) has earned eighteen medals (compared to Bolt’s 16) and also received the World Beer Cup Champion Small Brewery and Brewmaster Award. Jonathan is the grown-up equivalent of the Candy Man – he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good. Not only that, he drinks for free… all the time.

Quentin Tarantino – Director, Actor, Writer, Producer, et al.

Tarantino may be responsible for award winning films like Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill(s), and Inglourious Basterds, but he used to be a lowly clerk in a video store. He managed to turn his passion for film into one of the most successful Hollywood “bootstraps” story – without ever setting foot in a film school. If any of us were to blatantly display our foot fetish in the modern media like he does we would be excommunicated and disowned. With Tarantino it just becomes another part of his genius. Love him or hate him, he gets to do what he loves for a living… and get paid exorbitant sums of money for it.

Derek Spors – Ice Cream Scientologist

You know who Ben & Jerry are, but they didn’t make their boutique ice cream shop the global powerhouse it is all by their lonesome – they had help. Derek Spors was an “ice cream scientologist” whose sole job was the creation of new flavors for Ben & Jerry’s. He was often tasked with going to restaurants and ordering every dessert on the menu, taking trips to trendy new restaurants, and tasting ice cream all day. Sounds like a very horrid existence. Somehow he managed to get his creations into approximately 67% of the homes in America (Ok. The statistic is made-up, but everyone loves Ben & Jerry’s so it HAS to be a big number.) and maintain relative anonymity. Granted, he’s not going to be mauled on the street for autographs, or chased by the pap – but he manages to stay socially connected with LinkedIn and a website without having a picture of himself on the Internet. That, in and of itself, may be more impressive than eating ice cream all day. On second thought, eating ice cream all day sounds pretty damn delicious.

Bill Graham – Concert Promoter

There are only a few jobs that afford you rock star luxuries (fame, fortune, drugs) without the obvious risks (disease, selling out, one-hit-wondering) and being a concert promoter is one of them. Bill Graham just happens to be one of the most famous. He ran both Fillmores and Winterland and rubbed elbows with the likes of the Stones and the Dead. Instead of buying tickets to see a concert at an overcrowded, expensive, dilapidated venue, just call the band up and have them rock YOUR venue – V.I.P. style. Sounds like a pretty sweet gig.

Jeremy Clarkson – Motoring Journalist / Car God

When you’re Jeremy Clarkson every day is casual Friday. You can wear jeans to the office every day because the office is a decommissioned airfield and hangar. Regular journalists may get special access to events or even cool new products to test. Enjoy your new wallet because Bugatti just delivered a Veyron to Clarkson so he could race it against a jet – or a Cessna – or a McLaren F1 – or drive to 253mph. Some say he refuses to drive cars that won’t spontaneously catch on fire, and he hates the smell of hair care products because it overpowers the gasoline smell. All we know is he’s called Jezzer.

Eran Egozy & Alex Rigopulos – Video Game Developers

Eran was a geek interested in music; Alex was a musician interested in geek. They met at MIT in the Media Lab and then founded Harmonix. That is how your Friday night was born and countless millions discovered the music their parents were listening to decades before. Do they have to tell people what to do and rock out with plastic instruments on the conference room table? Yeah, they do, but they also get to play video games all day. Is there anyone that doesn’t want to play video games all day? Now that’s “star power.”

Frank Miller – Artist

Madness? MADNESS?!?!?! This. Is. A. Dream. Joooobbbbbbbbbbb. You’ve seen 300, The Dark Knight, Sin City, and probably seen something inspired by Miller’s film-noir style comics, writing, and graphic novels. He gets to set his own hours, turn down calls from Stan Lee and New Line Cinema, and leverage his words by the thousands when he turns them into pictures and movies. When asked about his inspiration, Miller had this to say – “I like to draw hot chicks, fast cars and cool guys in trench coats. So that’s what I write about.” The autobiographical graphic novel turned screenplay turned film is sure to be epic.

R. Lee Ermey – Sergeant / Gun Nut

Think Jeremy Clarkson except with guns. He transitioned from his role as a Marine Drill Instructor into starring roles in films like Full Metal Jacket and Toy Story. Now he has Lock N’ Load on the History Channel, which is basically an exploration of weapons – both primitive and modern. One week he might be shooting traditional Chinese dynasty rockets; the following he could be testing the M134D 3,000 rounds per minute Mini-Gun. Big guns, big voice, big balls – he’s not a celebrity, he’s a role model. When you fire guns and yell all day you can get away with murder…even if it involved unscrewing someone’s head and shitting down their neck. OOHRAH!

Tell us Your Dream Job and Win Cool Gear

Leave a comment below telling us your dream job. On Wednesday 2/3 we’ll choose a winner who can select any item from our Men’s Gift Guide for under $50

MORE: The Roundup Features

12 Worst Photoshop Mistakes ever	10 Banned Disney Pictures	The faces behind movie monsters
10 Worst Sun Slip-Ups	Transparent Clothes Illusion	10 Ridiculously Obnoxious Celebrity Photos

Comments (66 Responses)

Posted by Phillip Alexander on January 26th, 2010 at 11:14 am

massage therapist for models.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUWE–SvLp8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUWE–SvLp8
-->
Posted by BH on January 26th, 2010 at 11:25 am

Backstage wardrobe stylist for every Victoria Secret Fashion show.
Posted by Andre G. on January 26th, 2010 at 1:52 pm

Sean Combs (aka P. Diddy) – Recording Artist/Entrepreneur/Urban Gentleman

Who wouldn’t want that lifestyle?
Posted by Joseph K on January 26th, 2010 at 2:34 pm

Anthony Bourdain’s job would be my dream job…gets to travel, eat, have a good time, and be paid a lot.
Posted by whatthegeek on January 26th, 2010 at 3:35 pm

being a concert promoter involves a lot of long hours, and lost hearing – it’s definitely not all it’s cracked up to be.

Oh, and my dream job? Pie tester. MMMmmmmmm pie.
Posted by Lee on January 26th, 2010 at 5:11 pm

it happens penguin falls on its back and nobody can help it to stand up. that is why there is a special man who cares after fallen penguins and helps them to keep alive. I wanna have this job: Pole, white snow and me
Posted by Kirk on January 27th, 2010 at 9:04 am

This is an easy one for me – Travel writer.

The chance to travel around the world and see all the places I’ve read about in National Geographic throughout the years.
Posted by Brad Chmielewski on January 27th, 2010 at 1:12 pm

Hey that’s the Hop Cast with Jonathan Cutler!
Posted by Jim on January 27th, 2010 at 1:36 pm

I’d go for the brewmaster job. I’m a homebrewer and a chemical engineer, so getting to play with the big brewing equipment would be a lot of fun.
Posted by barclay on January 27th, 2010 at 4:29 pm

I want to be a subway token person, just like that guy I saw sleeping on T.V!!
Posted by Marc on January 28th, 2010 at 12:25 am

Gene Simmons – Get to be the Demon all day long and have hot women throw themselves at you.

Although nowadays he is in his footsie jammies by 9pm…

But I would like to be Terry Richardson for day as well!
Posted by noone on January 28th, 2010 at 9:26 am

uhh… Mythbusters?
Posted by Rhys on January 28th, 2010 at 10:48 am

I read the R. Lee Ermey section in his voice.
Posted by alex on January 28th, 2010 at 1:36 pm

I would want to be a professional mattress tester…
Posted by dupont on January 28th, 2010 at 8:53 pm

pro skateboarder.

get paid pretty good money, travel around the world, and have no schedule at all. The only responsibility would be to sign a few autographs and have someone film you do what you already do for free.
Posted by Me leaves a comment! on January 29th, 2010 at 1:41 am

I DO have a job most men would like to have ….. i know because, almost everyday, more than just a few tell me so!

I work freelance (my own boss, my own descisions!)as a guitar tech for many different major metal and hard-rock bands. I hang with rock stars all day, sleep in late – even on work days, make great money , travel the world, and have several, WILLING AND READY! women around me at backstage or overnight parties so frequently … it gets almost boring sometimes.

You can keep all those jobs listed in this article … sorry, they just DON’T compare.
Posted by bless on January 29th, 2010 at 7:16 am

talk show host for a traveling food show + fitness show in one (to avoid the weight gain!)
Posted by Harsh Ramchandani on January 29th, 2010 at 1:49 pm

Hugh Hefner, founder of Playboy :]
Posted by Ben on January 29th, 2010 at 10:00 pm

an internationaly recognized comic creator
Posted by John Regina on January 30th, 2010 at 2:42 pm

My dream job would be a concert promoter, since the only thing that i find solace in is music i think that would be a terrific job, that or a sound mixer.
Posted by Bryce Park Applegate on January 30th, 2010 at 3:41 pm

For my “Dream Job,” I would like to own a chain of Bikini Wax / Bra Fitting franchises. I would have weekend specials on Taint Bleaching and full body spray tan applications. The cost of all services would be based on weight and/or body odor. I haven’t worked out the name yet, but I’d certainly have to reference KFC somehow. Colonel Handers? Chicks and Waffles? I’ll work on it.
Posted by Michael S on January 30th, 2010 at 8:04 pm

My 12yr of experience, $40 an hour journeyman electrician position (laid-off since May). You know keep the house and car, support my family, all that mundane s**t.
Posted by Alex on January 30th, 2010 at 8:26 pm

Thong Designer
Posted by Max D on January 31st, 2010 at 4:40 pm

George Steinbrenner in his prime. Own the Yankees, say whatever you want, I’d take it.
Posted by August8th on January 31st, 2010 at 5:26 pm

Best job ever, Pyrotechnician, blow stuff up for bands like Metallica, GNR, Maiden, Rush, KISS and a ton of others. Work with fire and ice effects And you get to tour with kickass bands. It’s a win win.
Posted by Richard Lee on January 31st, 2010 at 5:53 pm

comic book artist
Posted by Shawn H on January 31st, 2010 at 5:58 pm

I have a dream job. I am an anthropologist/archaeologist and I spend my time traveling to many places and visiting with and learning about how people in different places and diffeenet times live. For a people-watcher, this is an ideal job and I love it. When I go away, friends ask me if I am going away for plasure or for work. I respond yes!!
Posted by dylan on January 31st, 2010 at 6:03 pm

Are you kidding me man. Number one is Hugh Hefner life. what the fuck? Your head is up your ass with this post!!!
Posted by Bill Ivory on January 31st, 2010 at 6:57 pm

I dare say it would have been nice to be the “inventor” of that silly little thing that seems be really catching on. What are the kids calling it these days? Ahh, ummm, oh yeah, Microsoft. That would be sweet. If not that, being the worlds greatest computer hack ever might suffice. Just think about how nice it would digitally pilfer the accounts of every drug lord on the face of the planet provided you could get clean away with it.
Posted by uhdw on February 2nd, 2010 at 12:19 pm

Beyonce..rich,talented,beautiful,popular..

who wouldn’t want that?!
Posted by brandon welsh on February 2nd, 2010 at 2:37 pm

my dream job would be to grow legal cannabis.
Profile

Posted by Cool Material on February 4th, 2010 at 2:32 pm

We tallied up a whopping 5 votes and we have a winner. In our next lives we want to be Freelance Guitar Techs – the music, the tours, the groupies AND you get to sleep late? Sold!

Congrats “Me leaves a comment!” we’ll shoot you an email shortly.
Posted by Marin Tim on February 4th, 2010 at 4:35 pm

J-Lo used to have someone touring with her whose job it was to tweek her nipples. What a job that would be.
Posted by Jonny5 on February 4th, 2010 at 4:58 pm

“Sean Combs (aka P. Diddy) – Recording Artist/Entrepreneur/Urban Gentleman

Who wouldn’t want that lifestyle?”

Anyone who doesnt like being a douche.
Posted by Leprechaun on February 4th, 2010 at 7:19 pm

Country music bass player. All the royalties, fame, cow girls, and you only have to know 3 notes!
Posted by Leprechaun on February 4th, 2010 at 7:22 pm

How about an animal psychologist? I knew one in Calif. Where do you get a degree for that? Can’t be sued for malpractice, and the guy even set up 2 times a week sessions for a dog that was moving out of state. All for the paltry sum of $150/hr. THAT is a job!
Posted by just the facts on February 5th, 2010 at 7:04 pm

not to dis concert promoting as a job, but Bill Graham’s been dead for maybe 10 yrs? Granted, his job now is pretty easy, but laying in a moldy box 6 ft underground 24x7x365 is not ideal in my book… I think the guitar tech has it nailed!
Posted by QQ on February 9th, 2010 at 11:02 am

Professional wine reviewer, you get to travel, drink, eat great food….drink.
Posted by sackgrinder on February 11th, 2010 at 9:59 am

Rocco Siffredi. Best job ever.
Posted by the man on February 11th, 2010 at 7:15 pm

I know all of you are thinking it but no one is saying it, so ill say it……

MALE PORNSTAR!!

i dont get it? was that not obvious?
Posted by Epiphany on February 15th, 2010 at 5:08 pm

I’d want the Harmonix job. I’m a woman though.
Posted by artmodelman on February 17th, 2010 at 5:43 pm

I teach male anatomy to female med students… It is like a braille anatomy class. They use me to learn all about male anatomy. It is a hands on class… I love my work!
Posted by rayzah on February 18th, 2010 at 9:52 am

bill gates. need i say more.
Posted by Big Ern on February 18th, 2010 at 3:14 pm

Long-snapper in the NFL.200 grand a year and the best seat in the stadium for about 6 snaps a game.
Posted by scott on February 19th, 2010 at 3:31 pm

photographer for playboy and hustler
Posted by Mark Meyer on February 19th, 2010 at 7:40 pm

Fitting specialist in a lingerie store
Posted by z e on February 20th, 2010 at 4:17 pm

Frank Miller has basically always been my God, i love the mans work
Posted by trythismango on February 21st, 2010 at 4:54 am

Those guys that review gourmet restaurants
Posted by trythismango on February 21st, 2010 at 4:54 am

And those who find out video game codes
Posted by trythismango on February 21st, 2010 at 4:55 am

RUSS MEYER, gazillion Xs better than Tarentino
Posted by trythismango on February 21st, 2010 at 4:56 am

JUNKYARD WARS whatever!
Posted by Bim on February 21st, 2010 at 9:44 am

ERRR…WTF … hugh hefner?
Posted by gilean on February 22nd, 2010 at 7:27 am

I know all of you are thinking it but no one is saying it, so ill say it……

MALE PORNSTAR!!

i dont get it? was that not obvious?

posted by the man

on February 11th, 2010 at 7:15 pm

Are you sure about that i dont but i guess there is porn movies for gays. you should clarify that.

in other words just get money,success or sth different you dont need be porn star to hook up someone.
Posted by Gryndyl on February 27th, 2010 at 12:57 pm

I AM a brewmaster. Does that mean I win?
Posted by organs on March 1st, 2010 at 10:08 pm

Remember Michael Jackson? The dead one? No, the LONG dead one? He had the greatest job in the world.

If you don’t know who I mean, he was known as “The Beer Hunter”.
Posted by Mr T on March 2nd, 2010 at 10:02 am

Porn star and weed quality tester
Posted by YAYA on March 4th, 2010 at 9:25 pm

Richard Branson is the man. He owns his own island and just rolls in dough.
Posted by liyoby on March 7th, 2010 at 1:47 am

BE A PHOTOGRAGHER IS A DREAM
Posted by Graythiswall on March 8th, 2010 at 11:53 pm

designing really shitty things then getting a laugh because some marketing genius sells them for an extraordinary amount of money ))) it’s sooooo much fun
Posted by YAK on March 9th, 2010 at 12:24 am

I’d like to pick the winner!
Posted by Davo on March 9th, 2010 at 5:20 am

Sniper
Posted by leonard stevenson on March 11th, 2010 at 11:10 am

Hi! My dream job would be a product tester! Need to test cross cuntry skis, new hotels, massage cream, clothes, sexual items, and goto different locales to test them? I’d love that!
Posted by Jon Romanelli on March 11th, 2010 at 11:52 am

I wanna be Sidney Crosby
Posted by Toss You Out on March 24th, 2010 at 5:20 pm

What you guys seem to forget is that after a while, its a job just like any other, no matter how great it sounds…. you get calloused to it.

Do you have any idea how often I hear about how I have the greatest job in the world? Minimum a few times a week.

What do I do?

I am a bouncer at a large, famous, and extremely popular strip club. I meet celebrities and sports players regularly, oh, and did I mention we have about 150 girls that work there? That’s 300 very perky bare titties that rub against me on a regular basis! Did I mention we’re a full-nude club? No wussy topless-only stuff! And no, we don’t hire anything and everything here, if a girl’s not at least an 8.5 out of 10, she can work somewhere else. We have a lot of girls that are without a doubt Playboy magazine quality.

BUT

Remember I said it becomes just a job after a while? There are low points, too..

-Dealing with drunken idiots

-Cleaning up broken glass and puke

-Idiots pulling knives, guns, etc. because you threw ‘em out

-Dealing with police because you removed someone who wouldn’t leave willingly, now because you dragged them out and embarrassed them they want to charge you with assault, even if you didn’t hurt them in the slightest (even if you really really wanted to)

-abusive drunken club owner for a boss

So you see, its not all just T & A. We put up with a lot of shit in our job. And I’m sure MOST perfect sounding jobs are like that.
Posted by j on April 14th, 2010 at 12:25 am

You forgot Anthony Bourdain.
Posted by anon on April 23rd, 2010 at 1:50 pm

The part where you included Jeremy Clarkson, you should have included James May and Richard Hammond as well.

Follow Cool Material
Facebook RSS Email Twitter

The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on Earth | Cracked.com

jen1979 — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 23:32:33 -0000

Clipped by jen1979

Articles
Browse By
- All Articles »
- Movies & TV
- Music
- Celebrities
- Tech
- Sex
- Sports
- News
- Science
- History
- Weird World
Featured Articles
- The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on Earth
  
  by Jacopo della Quercia | 329,491 views
- 6 Devious Ways Farmville Gets People Hooked
  
  Aug 16, 2010 | 192,928 views
- Linkstorm 08.16.10: Comic Book College and Why You're Bad in Bed
  
  Aug 13, 2010 | 755 views
- 6 Amazingly High-Tech Ancient Weapons
  
  Aug 15, 2010 | 479,210 views
- Everyone's Dream is Someone Else's Nightmare [COMIC]
  
  Aug 15, 2010 | 130,962 views
Videos
Browse By
Featured Videos
- Google Wave: A Pissed Off Tutorial
  
  by Cody Johnston | 141,572 views
- Why The Planeteers Should Never Get High
  
  Aug 10, 2010 | 152,371 views
- If Every Website Got a Melodramatic Movie
  
  Aug 05, 2010 | 117,217 views
- Buried Alive: Why You're Going to Want Your Cellphone
  
  Aug 02, 2010 | 141,192 views
- Eyeball Tattoos: Understanding This Horrible Decision
  
  Jul 26, 2010 | 306,775 views
Columnists
Browse By
Featured Columnist Entries
- 5 Baffling Search Queries Answered by a Complete Lunatic
  
  by Soren Bowie | 90,243 views
- Performing Stand-Up Comedy (With SCIENCE!)
  
  Aug 13, 2010 | 98,101 views
- 4 Real Survival Guides for Wildly Improbable Situations
  
  Aug 12, 2010 | 264,664 views
- Finding the Underground Dance Scene Hollywood Promised Me
  
  Aug 10, 2010 | 88,370 views
- Dr. Strange The Movie: Why It's Not as Crazy As It Sounds
  
  Aug 08, 2010 | 89,864 views
Forum
Craptions
Topics
More

The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on Earth

By Jacopo della Quercia Aug 16, 2010 329,491 views

Remember being bored out of your skull because your parents dragged you to some stupid museum when you were a kid? Well, it could have been worse. Much worse.

Because there are apparently museums out there capable of inflicting the kind of trauma a person never recovers from.

#7.

El Museo De Las Momias

Location: Guanajuato, Mexico

The El Museo is the museum of HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THAT!

Why... does that exist anywhere?

To say this is a museum full of mummies doesn't even come close to conveying the unspeakable horror of this place. How about this: In ancient Rome, and college fraternities, there is a brutal and humiliating tradition known as running the gauntlet, during which you strip naked and run through a valley of horrors. Guanajuato's El Museo De Las Momias ("Museum of the Mummies") is just like that, except that it's the spectators who are naked. And dead.

You know one of those hands will reach out and grab you.

The Mummies of Guanajuato are naturally preserved bodies from a cholera outbreak that hit Guanajuato way back in 1833. Since this is basically just a huge open grave with floodlights, its legality and moral status continues to be the subject of much discussion everywhere except in Mexico.

Most of the mummies on display were corpses whose families could not afford to pay a grave tax levied on their families once they died. If you failed to pay the taxes, you guessed it...

You went up on display.

Hey, have we mentioned the babies?

"Come play with us..."

"...forever..."

"...and ever..."

Oh, and while we're on the subject of nightmarish carnivals of the rotting dead...

#6.

Catacombe dei Cappuccini

Location: Palermo, Sicily

Welcome to Catacombe dei Cappuccini: the Capuchin Catacombs of Palermo, Sicily. Described as a "human library," the Catacombs serve as an invaluable historic record on everything from clothing trends to fear tolerance.

In 1599, the monks who lived here discovered a great new method for embalming the dead, and as the situation warranted, they went to work embalming each other. Then wealthy locals wanted to be interred in the Capuchin Catacombs as a status thing.

Despite being as old as Galileo and bombed to hell during World War II, some of the inhabitants of the Capuchin Catacombs still look pretty fresh...

...And all of them dressed in the finest clothes, eagerly awaiting the Resurrection.

Seriously, what the fuck...

"BUY POSTCARDS!"

#5.

The Glore Psychiatric Museum

Location: St. Joseph, Missouri

The Glore Psychiatric Museum, formally known as Missouri's State Lunatic Asylum No. 2, is like the Event Horizon of art galleries.

They call this one "Schizophrenia."

The museum takes its name from one George Glore, who in the 60s, put his patients/inmates at the St. Joseph State Hospital to work building full-size replicas of some of the most horrific psychiatric practices from the last few centuries--which makes about as much sense as making the inmates at Guantanamo Bay build Big Macs until they love America.

Apparently, building creepy shit like this is a damn good way to get sane.

The result is a weird and terrifying excursion through the minds of a hundred lunatics, displaying patient art which ranges from sophisticated...

Albeit psychopathic.

To South Park...

Stan?

But the, uh, highlight of the museum has to be this magnificent mosaic, which was constructed entirely from the stomach contents of a woman suffering from compulsive swallowing.

That horror is 100 percent stomach contents.

It is actually hard to picture anyone going crazy over anything in Missouri, but now that we have seen what their hospitals look like, it is probably best to avoid the state. After all, the woman who swallowed those 1,446 objects died in surgery. So who the fuck made the mosaic?

#4.

The Museum of Menstruation & Women's Health

Location: New Carrollton, Maryland

We're all adults here, hopefully. Menstruation isn't any more disgusting than the other bodily functions we don't discuss in polite company. So what's wrong with having a museum dedicated to the subject?

How about the fact that it's in some random dude's basement in lower Maryland.

This guy!

While there genuinely is a long history to menstruation's imprint on culture, from its symbolic record to its inclusion in Cervantes' Don Quixote , the Museum of Menstruation & Women's Health is really just the story of one man with a dream: Harry Finley.

Since 1995, this humble, middle-aged American has devoted his life to making his private collection of feminine hygiene products and mutilated mannequins available to the public. His work has received accolades from Johns Hopkins University and The New York Times--at least according to his website--and Harry's reputation has since blossomed from local neighborhood character to a character from a Thomas Harris novel.

Among the museum's collections are a dress made out of tampons...

...well kept archives...

...whatever the hell these are...

...and finally, the intimacy of knowing that you and Harry are the only people in the house. For real. Since 1999, all visits to the museum/Harry's basement have had to be done by appointment and in private.

We imagine so that no one can hear you scream.

First
Previous
Page 1 of 2
Next
Last

Recommended for Your Pleasure

7 Lost Bodies of Work (That Would Have Changed Everything)

by: Jacopo della Quercia

1,045,908 views
5 Ridiculous Ancient Beliefs That Turned Out to Be True

by: CRACKED Staff Sam Blitz

1,256,145 views
5 Real Historical Death Stars (Complete With Baffling Flaws)

by: Phillip Parsons

718,194 views
6 Movie Plots That Could Have Been Solved In Minutes

by: Jacopo della Quercia

1,071,547 views

Show Profanity

290 Comments

Harry Finley; Rapist.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 4:18 PM

Crack_Addicted

Im going to stand up, walk out of this room and we shall never speak of these evil places again.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 4:16 PM

RandyChimp

good lord, St.Joseph is just down the road from me...suddenly I'm worried about where I live

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 4:05 PM

Bathawk

oh nice !Sadly, My boyfriend and me broke up weeks ago. yeah..

i’m young ,beautiful,lonely and still hurting.i may be

in need of someone to love..still..My friends told me about

A g e l e s s k i s s .C’ 0- M. and i got curious about it..

they met their boyfriends there.,It’s the best place to meet

a older boyfriend or a younger girlfriend. i cant risk myself.

.So i got a username sara lady there in order to find a new

boyfriend.is it wrong?

W

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 4:03 PM

ladygagaw3e

"BUY POSTCARDS"... omg, I just laughed so hard like it was delivered by the worst Scooby Doo villain hahaha.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 4:00 PM

xsamxdravenx

Elmo's dick? Seriously? I thought it would have just been a red fuzzy tube, kind of a joke more than anything. f**king scary.

What about the amazing museum in Rome with all the mummified bodies/bones? Can't remember the name, but come on they have a perfectly mummified little girl that looks completely alive!!!

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:56 PM

ActionBastrd

I had to go to the Mutter museum as part of a high school band trip. It was so horrifying every one in the band had left after 5 minutes.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:55 PM

elilupe

I would so rather go to all of the other museums in this list in one day than go to the ventriloquist museum. Those dummies are the most terrifying thing in the world.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:53 PM

moefreak

welcome to ::[ w w w . Y a h c c . u s ]

(b..r..a..n..d.)s.h.o.e.s.(34u.s.d),,

==J. a .m .e )) shoes

< j o r d a n> (1-24) shoes

< j o r d a n> 2010 shoes

c.l.o.t.h.i.n.g,,j.e.a.n,,h.a.n.d.b.a.g(35u.s.d),,

==c .o. a .c .h )) handbag

(f.r.e.e)s.h.i.p.p.i.n.g

[ w w w . Y a h c c . u s ]

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:53 PM

jkldsfjs

Was just at the Mutter Museum a couple weeks ago. By far one of the coolest (albeit grossly disturbing) museums I've ever been too.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:45 PM

josh2449

The man who owns the Menstrual Museum is obviously a serial killer. A perfect one too. As soon as he kills you, your blood is absorbed by the numerous tampons...

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:36 PM

TrumpetBoner

I wonder what happened to the intern who had to do research for this article?

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:36 PM

MagicBra

What the hell? Dude, I was eating!

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:31 PM

Dreadjaws

This article is really hard to masturbate to.

1 Replies | Hide Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:30 PM

Senial

if you squint it gets easier

Posted on 8/16/2010 3:46 PM

kitsuke

"BUY POSTCARDS!" HAHahaha, dunno why but that was one of the best things on Cracked in a while

2 Replies | Hide Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:25 PM

Vindowviper

I know I couldn't stop laughing at that caption/photo combination

Posted on 8/16/2010 3:26 PM

erincandy

I agree 100% That s**t had me laughing for 10 minutes :D

Posted on 8/16/2010 3:37 PM

PFirefly

Holy s**t, this article was equal parts hilarious and creepy. "BUY POSTCARDS" made me laugh out loud so hard. And I'd rather see 10,000 inside out babies then be in that horrific dummy museum.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:23 PM

erincandy

somehow i knew the mutter museum would b on this list. it's funny while all the other places on the list sound freaky as s**t, the mutter museum didn't freak me out when i went there; i thought it was fascinating.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:22 PM

aaa100

By far the creepiest one is the Menstrual Museum. I mean, I am sure the gross out factor is higher in Mutter or the c**k n Tackle shop.

But it's some guy, in his basement, and you have to agree to come see it alone.. WITH him....

I smell "serial killer" all over this like an old tampon, he just hasn't been caught yet.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:19 PM

kitsuke

stay out of the ventriloquist museum, pistol pete is their leader! none of us are safe!

1 Replies | Hide Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:14 PM

Crackwhore-1000

Don't you mean "Popsicle" Pete?

Posted on 8/16/2010 3:30 PM

Dreadjaws

Hehe, the ventriloquist;s name was Willy Wood. And as for the Icelandic c**k museum, a large penis is always welcome.

0 Replies | Reply | Posted on 8/16/2010 3:10 PM

troll_alx

See All 290 Comments

Show Profanity

Friends' Recent Activity

Aug 16th: A Day In Cracked History

5 Daring Crimes (That It Turns Out Never Happened)

by: Jeff Kelly | 410,440 views
The 5 Most Underrated Simpsons Characters

by: Yankee Pot Roast | 359,526 views
Iron Man Armor

by: LukeMcKinney | 233,799 views
Freddie Mercury

by: music788 | 215,265 views
Twilight: A Tragic Misunderstanding

by: Mike Jacobsen | 161,326 views

100 Hilarious Sign Fails (PICS) : COED Magazine

jen1979 — Thu, 29 Jul 2010 19:12:55 -0000

Clipped by jen1979

RSS

100 Hilarious Sign Fails (PICS)

July 26, 2010 by COED Staff

4 Comments

Nothing like a hilarious sign fail to brighten the day! From innuendo to irony, plain stupid to plain bizarre, COED has all of your sign fail needs. We found 100 examples of the human race’s tragic fall from grammatically-correct grace (circa the discovery of stating the obvious). Check it out, but beware of prostitutes, swimming over the speed limit, and no-pee zones..

Check out these great posts from our partners

All Forms of Animation Wallpapers	Jenny Mccarthy: A Miracle of Her Own	Black Ruby Rolls-Royce Coupe
The Craziest Trees Ever Seen	Kate Perry Outshined Everyone	The 8 Million Dollar Maybach Exelero

Comments

4 Responses to “100 Hilarious Sign Fails (PICS)”

CitiesTurnedToDust says:

July 29, 2010 at 1:49 pm

So what the heck is funny about the mountain lion sign? Did you guys just throw it in the mix at random, or is there something on there you don’t understand?

Speak Your Mind

Tell us what you're thinking...

and oh, if you want a pic to show with your comment, go get a gravatar!

Advertise on COED

The Little Girl On A Plane [Joke]

newbie — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 19:46:54 -0000

Clipped by newbie

Hilarious Neon Light Failures

newbie — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 18:35:44 -0000

Clipped by newbie

All store owners obviously want all their equipment to be working properly. However, sometimes it’s truly essential that their neon lights don’t fail.

Made For Wheelchairs – FAIL!

newbie — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 15:32:00 -0000

Clipped by newbie

Made For Wheelchairs – FAIL!

Extremely Lazy People

newbie — Fri, 28 May 2010 20:17:15 -0000

Clipped by newbie

Extremely Lazy People

There are a lot of lazy people, but here are some of the laziest.

And here is one perfect gift for lazy people - a new type of Rubik's Cube

Funny Evolution Of a Man

newbie — Wed, 26 May 2010 18:37:25 -0000

Clipped by newbie

Funny Evolution Of a Man

(36 votes)

Views

24173

Clips tagged humor

SURE, FARTS ARE FUNNY – But Do We Want To Eat Them?

Chiles y Risas: bromas

Chiles y Risas: bromas

Drunk Hotline

5 Things Girls Do To Look Better In Facebook Pictures | Rounds.com Blog

1. Only Show Your Face

2. Showcase Your Special Talent

3. Dim The Lights

4. Work That “Myspace Angle”

5. Get Creative

Related Posts:

2 Comments

stupid

jojack

Leave a Comment

Rate and Comment On Funny Pictures

11 best commercials featuring Darth Vader | Blastr

TAKEOVER CONTENT HERE

11 best commercials featuring Darth Vader

Spike

Energizer

Orange

Target

WWF

DirecTV (Spanish)

Pepsi

NES

M&Ms

TomTom

Hagoromo tuna

9 Jobs Most Men Would Die For | Cool Material

Terry Richardson – Photographer

Jonathan Cutler – Brewmaster

Quentin Tarantino – Director, Actor, Writer, Producer, et al.

Derek Spors – Ice Cream Scientologist

Bill Graham – Concert Promoter

Jeremy Clarkson – Motoring Journalist / Car God

Eran Egozy & Alex Rigopulos – Video Game Developers

Frank Miller – Artist

R. Lee Ermey – Sergeant / Gun Nut

Tell us Your Dream Job and Win Cool Gear

Comments (66 Responses)

Follow Cool Material

The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on Earth | Cracked.com

The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on Earth

Recommended for Your Pleasure

Friends' Recent Activity

More On Weird World

100 Hilarious Sign Fails (PICS) : COED Magazine

100 Hilarious Sign Fails (PICS)

Check out these great posts from our partners

Comments

Speak Your Mind

Subscribe to Email Updates

Hot Links

Recent Articles

COED on Digg

The Little Girl On A Plane [Joke]

Hilarious Neon Light Failures

Made For Wheelchairs – FAIL!

Extremely Lazy People

Funny Evolution Of a Man